Fact is, I don't believe in them. To me it's just one big, obnoxious way of setting yourself up for failure. I take the "constantly re-evaluating" approach and adjust accordingly. Does this even make sense? Essentially, Guy and I bought a treadmill. It happens to coincide with the most popular time of year for lifestyle changes and new years resolutions. But it's not. This is a continuation of something started quite some time ago... not a sudden need to make myself better when faced with a liminal moment that is fresh, shiny and all brand new.
As some of you already know, I started down this road 3 years ago when I put my name on a list for the lap band surgery. I have been living with the lap band now for just over 14 months. I think I am doing rather well at this point in time in managing my food and not blocking... that's not to say I no longer block, but when I do it is do to something I have done wrong; not ignorance. My last adjustment was in march of 2011, and I struggled with that until about October. It took me nearly 7 months to adjust to that increase. I have roughly 6.5 ml in my 10 ml band. During my September/October (not sure which) appointment with my MD I asked when I would need another adjustment/how I would know I needed one, since it had been so long since I had had one. At that time he informed me that I would know that it was time when my portions increased essentially. And shortly thereafter I noticed that I actually felt hunger between meals and that my portions had increased. When I saw the doctor in November, I mentioned this, but also pointed out that I was heading off to NY (NY) and wasn't quite ready to have to struggle through adjusting to the new restrictions while traveling. He totally agreed and also wanted to wait and see what my ultrasound said about the intense pain I was experiencing. He also said something to me that really stuck. He said that my weight loss should not solely be based on restrictions... on low calorie intake. We discussed my non-existing exercise regiment and agreed to hold on an adjustment.
Enough with the background now. As most of you know, I have been trying to incorporate exercise into my life, make it part of this lifestyle change that I have been working on. For a while during the summer, I felt that I found a great way of adding exercise into my life by walking 3.5 km home from my children's daycare. But the daycare changed, Imogene went to school and our patterns were all different. I don't know how you all do it. I mean I find that my schedule is quite charged with work, the kids, a tiny little life... I don't know when I could possibly fit exercise in. But let's be honest, it has NEVER been a priority. I would rather read, or work on my photography than do that. I could join a gym, but by the time I get the kids settled for the night, and that time is mine again I have no interest whatsoever in getting into the car to go publicly humiliate myself and sweat with strangers. So there it is, a treadmill. Well not yet.
Step 1: make the purchase (check!).
Step 2: pick-up the purchase (scheduled for Friday, January 6)
Step 3: assembly the purchase (hopefully same day as pick-up)
Step 4: buy an outfit to workout in? Ok, fine... just use the damn thing.
I'll let you know how my four step program works out.
I hope the holidays treated you all kindly, and that this new year is wonderful. I feel good about it!
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